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Posted: April 2nd, 2003, by Ollie

I feel an attempt to discuss the current state of the word in an articulate and valid way would be an exercise in futility. Like Marceline said, it’s near impossible to take account of the whole sphere of issues and collect them into neat little sentences, and right now even thinking about it for more than 10 minutes at a time makes me very unhappy indeed. See? Even know I sound like a complete fool, so I’ll change the subject…

THE INTERNET! There’s a good one. I’ve been giving a lot of thought of late. Well, the internet in the terms of how I and probably a lot of people reading this might use it. So far I haven’t come to many solid conclusions, but there are a lot of interesting things to think about. There is pretty much one reason I will bother to look at anything on here, and that is music (dun dun duh!) and obviously this is how I stumbled across diskant and many other sites of a similar vein. Nowadays, or at least recently, this has turned into a seemingly endless pursuit to hear new things that excite me, which seems to manifest itself in the purchase of more records than I can afford. The centre of this activity for some time has rather predictably been that wretched hive of scum and villainy, Ebay. Now, it has long ago occurred to me and no doubt many of you, that spending one’s time simply acquiring possessions (which is what it is at the end of the day) does not a worthwhile existence make. I have a big list of the records I own up on Skylabcommerce, so that other people can see how great I am at what I do. I am under no illusion that this is the most horrifically anal and inexcusably geeky thing that I could be doing, but hear me out. For a long time I bought the latest CDs from latest bands that NME had decided that I should like, because that was all the exposure to anything vaguely interesting that I was exposed to in my happy little middle-class town. This lasted for some years, until I saw fit to further this pastime and invest in a shiny new computer. And lo, all of a sudden, I was given choices. There was literally a world of information at my fingertips, and I was bombarded with bold new ideas and ways of doing things that I would have probably been blissfully unaware of if I’d stuck to the safe old NME. And now, some years on, I still discover new things everyday that remind me why listening to music is exciting to me. I say listening, because I am one of the few who have never made the transition from passive spectator to a doer. I feel that this, while apparently branding me worthless in the eyes of some on the other side of the spectrum, does allow me to see things objectively. This is kind of irrelevant, and not what I was aiming at, but I do feel some minor glimmer of self importance in that I can feel how I want about a band, without the worry of having to appear to ‘do any better’. Anyway! Had it not been for the internet, I would not have been given said choices. This is why, despite the endless amounts of bilge that riddles this place, I do feel like it will always be a vitally important thing in terms of kids and music. My account with Skylab may generate many mocking remarks in those who simply see it as me ‘showing off’ in some pathetic manner, in fact I myself cringe a tiny bit everytime I look at the page, but it is one of the few ways I am able to hear the things I would otherwise not be able to. It’s very easy to condemn such activity if you come from, or live in a place where things are happening around you which excite you. Those who live in the places where stuff does appear to actually ‘happen’ (London, Nottingham, wherever) do not know the struggles of those of us shut away in our bedrooms trying desperately to be impressed, amazed, or sometimes even mildly amused. Damn, this is getting quite long. All this stuff stops me from completely condemning things like Makeoutclub, which while on the surface is solely frequented by the most despicable hipster/scenester scum, I’m sure it is for a lot of kids, the only way they have to meet people of a like mind. If there weren’t these few things which remind people that there are things going on outside in the world, then there would I’m sure be even more filthy ben sherman clad macca fuckwits roaming the streets. These things actually have the ability to save kids from the horrible inevitability of a working in a bank, going down the pub on a friday night/picking a fight on the way home, 2 weeks in Ibiza every year lifestyle that so many young people already subscribe to.

FUCK KNOWS what I’m talking about now. As usual I can’t convey how I feel with mere words. Contrary to popular belief, I’m a simple boy, and I don’t need much to make me happy. The love of a good woman, and knowing there are a few boxes of vinyl in my living room are more than enough


Ollie lives in Cambridge and puts on gigs as part of Crushing Death and Grief.


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