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Posted: November 6th, 2002, by Chris H

Yesterday, a colleague at work showed off his 13 week old son. He was so happy, his partner and he recently got a mortgage on their first house.

Today, that colleague had a visit from his boss who is based in London. I met him coming down the stairs as I arrived. He’d been fired before he’d taken his coat off.

The boss called us around and said “as of this morning [x] has left [the company]. I can’t discuss it for reasons of confidentiality. Any other questions?” No-one dared ask questions. Not even “do you mean you fired him?”

Later the boss went round us all individually, “listening to our concerns” and chatting more generally like she hadn’t just travelled up for one day to fire a man I have a lot of respect for.

When she came to me I chatted about how I had been slightly deaf in one ear since I caught a cold last month, “oh, so it must sound like I’m throwing my voice,” she replied.

I hate myself for having kept my head down. Every few months they come up and fire someone, pour encourager les autres-style. The only defence I can think of is to leave before it’s my turn. Way to build a successful company you callous bastards.

Chris H

Chris was hit by a brick as a child and lost the popular culture part of his brain. This affliction means he is only able to listen to obscure japanese noise bands and watch films with overtly complex storylines. His other interests include skulking, editing documents, taunting policemen and entering undecipherable handwriting contests. He lives in an enormous underground laboratory where he spends many hours trying to un-invent television.

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