I’d like to apologise for being away on holiday and not posting here going ‘woo, I’m in the south of France!’, cos now obviously you won’t believe I was really there. And I can’t even say I was so much in the middle of nowhere that there wasn’t an internet cafe as there were two in the wee town I was in. So I’m afraid it was entirely that I was enjoying myself too much to give you all a second thought. I did find the time for some record shopping though during a day trip to Bordeaux and thanks to Hugues for giving me directions to a rather ace record shop called Total Heaven which was filled with lots of UK, US and European vinyl. Not to mention a nice big box of local band releases and a big display of fanzines [all in french, sadly for me]. They’re on the Rue de Candale so go there if you’re ever in the vicinity. Shopping in Bordeaux was probably the most exciting thing I did in France but wandering about the alleyways of Sarlat, driving through some staggeringly beautiful places, visiting castles, caves and water gardens and seeing my mother for the first time in months wasn’t exactly un-exciting.

Nor indeed was my return to the UK where I hopped on a bus to Oxford and spent a hugely fun weekend there for Audioscope. Despite being robbed of all but a few hours’ sleep by Fighting Red Adair and their talking all night antics, I had a great time tending the Appliance merch stall and stumbling over to photograph the bands. You should be hearing more about Audioscope in the next issue of the diskant ZINE but suffice to say it was a fantastic day, both in terms of the bands and the amount of money they raised. Top bands for me were Cat On Form, Appliance, Souvaris and Dustball. Hello to everyone I met at Audioscope by the way, especially Jill and Jamie for making me feel like all this time and energy we put into diskant is actually appreciated by real people.

Boo, commenting is broke so I can’t add snidey comments to Chris’s post there. I’ll just have to post my own ramblings instead. Got a couple of hours to spare til I have to go catch a plane. so, aye, Gig on the Green. I think the general consensus was that it was pish. Generally speaking. There were some good bands playing and I like it being in the town and the weather was perfect but all the general festivalness of it and the smallness just made it a bit of a disappointment. Main whine would be that the New Bands stage was hidden away, not publicised and finished hours earlier than the other stages. Oh yeah, and 90% of the new bands were rubbish too. The Silver Pill were indeed quite good, especially for their amusing mud diving, security baiting friends. I’d have liked to see RAAR as well but it was rather a lot of fun just watching them arse about backstage. Which is more than can be said for Trail of Dead: swotty Conrad Keely was sat translating French novels in the sunshine. And after making us break their fiendishly tricky guest list code to get there in the first place! They had tales of Axl Rose and Slipknot and the making of their very good new video though. Trail of Dead were ace by the way. Small kids going mental, much crowd jumping, rock styling, security guard tussling and happy upbeat songs about killing people. Who else did I see? Death Cab For Cutie were lovely and cuddly kitten emo jumper good, The Streets were kinda fun in a ‘look, it’s not a guitar band’ way but they weren’t anywhere near as good as Jason Reece seemed to think they were. Spiritualized were exactly as expected. No surprises but satisfactory despite the booming of the Prodigy seeping into the tent. And Slipknot were weak ass. Very disappointing but their crazed hyper-enthused fans almost made up for it.

Sunday was both less and more fun. The Bellrays I thought were just okay. Without her they’d be nothing and, idiotic though it sounds, I’ve never been that keen on people who can sing well. I liked the White Stripes better, doing a similar retro thing but with more pop and the kind of style branding that should have won someone an award by now. I left to see Guided By Voices only to discover they’d swapped sets with…..Leaves! So I made a hasty retreat back to the main stage. Would have liked to see the Reindeer Section but not more than seeing Jane’s Addiction who were total rawk frenzy. Perry Farrel set about proving his A+ loon credentials, wearing a huge feathered hat and prancing and posing all over the stage. They were funny as hell and preaching streams of nonsense. I got bored after that, having no wish to see Stereo MCs or Feeder and only a vague wish to see Pulp. I might have liked to see how The Strokes were getting on but then I’d have seen them live four times which is three times too many.

So, to sum up: I hate festivals but I like Trail of Dead.

First Pretty Girls Make Graves stayed at our house last night and were very nice so go see ’em if you get the chance. They’re doing London and Reading this week.

Finally, I got the new issue of Tasty fanzine in the post. I should snub it like how Sam snubbed our housewarming party but hey [hoho]. Unfortunately my copy was printed by a photocopier with Impressionist ambitions meaning it’s a bit of a struggle to read. At least it wasn’t into Abstract Expressionism I suppose. Anyway, it’s in honour of the forthcoming Tasty gig in Nottingham next Monday [featuring The Lollies, Darren Hanlon, The Liberty Ship, Kosmonaut and Dallas Burn if you’re interested, which you should be] and gives you a run down of who they all are. The Lollies kick in a UK tour diary which is good fun and good reading and there’s interviews with Ant, Chumbawamba and The Reverse [who feature a certain diskant columnist] as well as the usual stack of reviews and the political article [Immigration this issue]. Tasty’s getting reliable now so if you want indie pop and politics you know where to go. Free as always from the website or the gig.

Thousands of dawdling tourists WITH UMBRELLAS!

Hello, I’m back from a day in Festival frenzied Edinburgh. Can you tell? It was precisely while stumbling my way between people with umbrellas bigger than my house that I began to feel the beginnings of regret in choosing the acoustic niceness in Edinburgh over the crazy rock in Glasgow. But, hey, I got to eat pizza and watch Top of the Pops with Elizabeth. That was an experience in itself, not having a TV in diskant HQ and not having watched TOTP in a very long time. We were mostly struck by some new American boy band doing the live vocal acoustic slow number on stools thing and, astonishingly, being able to play instruments but not be able to sing in tune. What’s happening? In my day boy bands couldn’t sing or play any instruments and quite often they were quite ugly and couldn’t dance either. Then we got American boy bands who made a point of doing staggeringly dull acapella nonsense at every opportunity to prove that actually they could sing. If I could remember this new band’s name I’d be vaguely interested in whether their new boyband format actually works.

Anyway…fun though that was, I was over to see Chris Brokaw, James Orr Complex and the wee Stuart Mogwai. Except I’d been enjoying TOTP too much and having slight troubles finding the entrance to the venue and so missed most of Stuart’s set – booo! I did get to hear Cody though so I was happy enough. The whole night was one of those quick changeover and then kick out everyone so we can set up some crappy club night deals which annoy the hell out of me. The venue was really nice but give the promoters the time to spread the show out, give people time to arrive and enjoy the evening. So Stuart was quickly followed by the James Orr Complex aka Chris Mack who I’ve not seen for a while. He was damn lovely as always, intricate melodies tripping over themselves, the vocals translating emotion into poetry. And all honest, humble and friendly. Album out in a couple of months on Rock Action. You’d be an idiot not to buy it.

Another quicksmart stage swap and here we have Chris Brokaw, formerly of Come. I’ve not got anything by Come though so forgive me my viewpoint of ignorance. His presence was much more assured with more volume and power. The instrumental songs kept my attention in the main with the vocal tracks giving a helping jolt from the dreamy lull it was easy to slip into. The tracks I liked best were when he just riffed up some distorted noise in loops and waves. It was kind of like when Unwound hit the perfect riff and just keep at it and you wish they’d never stop, that the record would have one of those infinite grooves and it would go on forever. Yeah, it was like that. I could have done with way more from everyone. It should have been in a dark draped basement and carried on til dawn, taking shots and requests, making stuff up as it goes along. After felt too early, too wrong. I came home.

I spent a fantastically exciting day in the Housing Benefit offices today. No, actually, it was the most boring two hours of my life EVER. Luckily I had the foresight to bring along Stereo Sanctity, a fanzine that turned up in the post the other day so I didn’t quite go postal. What better literary companion culd you ask for really? Well, apart from one that took two hours to read I guess. Anyway, it promises “music, pop culture, politics and weirdness” on the cover and that’s pretty much what you get along with a hefty dollop of Sonic Youth worship.Which translates as an extensive write-up of the best bits of All Tomorrows Parties LA, articles on recommended comics and Melt-Banana, pretty funny cartoons featuring Sonic Youth and Steve Malkmus, some political rantings and a few record reviews. It’s well-written, friendly and enthusiastic and dotted throughout with good illustration. It’s making me really happy to see all these new fanzines springing out of odd places in the UK and hopefully this is just the beginning. Start supporting zines now and maybe we’ll be back up to 1995 levels again. Stereo Sanctity is definitely worth your cash so go buy so he can do #2. Not that he mentions how much it costs though. I shall endeavour to find out. In the meantime you can email him yourself.

Update: A word from the Editor

It costs 50p or a trade or a tape or something else nice, and the address is: Ben, 3 Ferry Cottages, Cosheston, Pembroke, Pembrokeshire, SA72 4TY

For reasons I’m not going to go into I was in [insert name of big record chain] today. Well, okay, I had to meet friends and I had to swap my IOU for a real live Fugazi ticket so we combined the two. Anyway, for reasons I’m not going to go into [ahem, Kim was really late…] I was there for quite a while and had a browse through the stuff. It’s a long time since I did this and blimey did they have some mental things in there. How can this be the only store in Glasgow to stock Blectum From Blechdom CDs? Why do they only stock old obscure Sonic Youth releases [nothing newer than Washing Machine]? My ponderings were distracted by the magazine stand where I discovered Comes With A Smile, a Copper Press style magazine, very nicely printed with a free CD and based in the UK. That high street record stores know more about cool new UK zines made me feel very odd. I remember similar situations when I lived in Aberdeen as well. I traipsed all round town one day looking for something by this exciting new Godspeed You Black Emperor! band. And which shop was the only one to stock it? Our Price. The world’s a strange place.

I forgot to say that when I was away Up North last week visiting my family I bought a finger puppet of a big eyeball! It’s pretty fantastic. I need some more plus Playmobil men and then I can make my own mental version of The Residents!

Okay, fanzine #2 is A Cheery Wave From Stranded Youngsters and I’ve managed to lose Al’s letter so I can’t remember what issue this is or how much it costs – DUH. Sorry about that. This issue’s mostly filled with lots and lots of lengthy gig reviews covering Trail of Dead, Fonda 500, Sigur Ros, Brian Wilson, The Rock of Travolta, Babes in Toyland and Maher Shalal Hash Baz amongst others written by a whole host of contributing writers. There’s also interviews with The Flashing Astonishers and The Supernaturals [when did they come back? and, more importantly, why? It’ll be The Gyres next], record reviews dotted about the place, a crossword and a good article on whether today’s bands are retro copycats or not, all illustrated with Al’s cartoon drawings. This issue is slightly lacking in bands that I’m excited about but it’s a good read nevertheless. Probably I’m getting too old. If I find that letter I’ll post up the proper details but I think it’s £1.50 to Al Maceachern, 6 Angotts Mead, Stevenage, Herts SG1 2NJ. Or email Al and ask him at alcwsy@hotmail.com

Don’t worry folks, I’m back and I’ve got fanzines to tell you about. I should have mentioned these ages ago so apologies to the people involved. I’ve been ill though boo hoo so forgive me.

First up is The Blooding which is a new fanzine based in Devon. It looks pretty fantastic as well, exactly like an old school jotter. I feel quite nostalgic looking at it. I feel like someone’s going to tell me to cover my book [in posters torn out of Smash Hits naturally] and write a book report on The Hill Of The Red Fox. But no, inside it’s even better than Gaelic Lairds smuggling guns since it’s got generally great interviews with Guy Fugazi, Bob Weston of Shellac, Les Savy Fav, Sean Organ, Steve Gullick, FrenchKiss Records, local kids Tyler and Richie Mills ex of Cable on the story behind the band’s demise. Blimey! As well as that you get bits and pieces on Dance of Days, All Gone Wrong Records, Kids Near Water, Positive Force DC, an excellent review of ATP2002 and a reprint of Nirvana’s open letter to fans over their feud with Courtney Love which has put me firmly on Courtney’s side thanks to their pathetic whining tone throughout. I shouldn’t even be needing to encourage you to buy this, you’re already skimming down to the contact details I imagine so I won’t hold you up. I do wonder how they’re going to top this next issue. I await it with great interest. In the meantime you should be packing £1.50 carefully into an envelope [I’d stick the coins to bit of cardboard if I were you] and addressing it to Jamie and Robin at 81 Mary Street, Bovey Tracey, Devon, TQ13 9HQ. Email them at the_blooding@hotmail.com if you’ve got any questions. You can also pick up a copy at the Cavern in Exeter.

More zines tomorrow. If you’re lucky

The Morning News have remembered how to be funny and witty and silly. I mean I really liked the new articles stuff and all the contributors but I missed the personal edge and the little anecdotes of what stupid stuff they’d been up to. It was like diskant without ME. And, ahem, who could imagine that? So hurray hurray, as I already said, for Letters From The Editors, Rosecrans and Andrew, both of which made me laugh out loud. I am officially jealous of the illustrations idea as well.

That’s the only hurray hurray news for today I’m afraid. The rest of my time is being spent riding the giddy rollercoaster of emotion all the way through frustration, depression, doom, gloom and the painful sparks of dashed hope. Otherwise known as trying to get your email via a proxy server. If anyone would like to come round and kill me then feel free. Or help me, that might even be better. That’s also a roundabout way of saying, ‘yes I am ignoring all your emails but not deliberately’.

Well, we went to see Spiderman last night and it was actually not bad at all. I was trying to think of any similar kind of blockbuster superhero type films that I’ve seen but I couldn’t so I’m comparing it to how I imagine other blockbuster superhero type films to be like. So the main good thing about it is how not blockbustery it is. Okay, you’ve got all the good vs evil, special effects filled battles, etc etc. but mostly it’s about the people and not their superhero alter egos. There’s a lot more Peter Parker in the film than there is Spiderman. It’s all very cartoony and colourful and fast and enjoyable really. Well, providing you can blind yourself to some of the really annoying plot holes [might be more fun in your own home so you can shout frustratedly at the screen]. It’s not the best film in the world and I imagine it will go into ever decreasing sequel madness over the years but it’s fun and worth seeing if you’re going to the cinema with a bunch of people or if you’re bored and you’ve already seen Star Wars.